July 12, 2010

“We’re at the E.R., he fell off your porch. He landed on his back, on top of the cement flowerpot.”

How bad is it?”

“He bruised almost all of his ribs, both front and back, and cracked a few.”

You, dad, of all people, don’t deserve to be in this much pain.


People can make fun of me.

You can threaten me, mock me, tear me to pieces.

I can handle it, but someday, someone will take your bullshit to heart.

You could hurt someone.

If an ex asks you for his stuff (aka: gifts he’s given you) back, you may do one of the following:

  1. Refuse to return his stuff
  2. Calmly and collectively return said stuff
  3. Break said stuff and leave them on his porch while screaming obscenities and driving away

I, personally, would have loved to have performed option number three. Unfortunately, by dropping by my house unexpectedly this afternoon, he discontinued these hopes for an entertaining scene.

“Hey. Can I have the poster back? The one I gave to you for your birthday? The one of myself?”

Yes, Mitchell, you can have your self-indulgent poster back. Now get out of my god damned house and find somebody else to annoy.


July 5, 2010

My grandma takes a bath every night before bed.

Walking down the hallway tonight, I smelled scented candles.

She hasn’t burnt them since grandpa died.

It’s easier to just not think about it.

The things in my life that I have reason to complain about.

So please stop reminding me.


July 2, 2010

Casey leaves for California. He will be back in two weeks.

Ben leaves for California. He will be back in two weeks.

Paul leaves to visit his grandparents. He will be gone one week.

I have the next two weeks off of work. Perfectly convenient, isn’t it? Grr…